


It's Not The Years, Honey, It's The Mileage

by ehmazing



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, Kissing, copious Indiana Jones references
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-10
Updated: 2011-05-10
Packaged: 2017-10-19 05:33:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/197471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ehmazing/pseuds/ehmazing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's no place like an imaginary Mayan tomb for a first date.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's Not The Years, Honey, It's The Mileage

**Author's Note:**

  * For [meredyd](https://archiveofourown.org/users/meredyd/gifts).



Dave swipes a hand across his brow, smearing mud all over his hairline, but he bets he can pull off the rugged, jungle-survivor look. _Lost_ was shit and that's what makes it ironic. He tosses the Smuppet from hand to hand, testing its weight. Aradia's wings flutter once, rustling her jacket as she leans over his shoulder.

"There are probably booby traps," she whispers, even though it's just the two of them in the chamber; Tavros was all-too-eager to stand guard at the entrance, lance at hand to fight off any potential dream Nazis or natives. "We could be completely wrong about the weight of the idol and end up triggering a cave-in that could crush us flat in seconds."

"Your confidence is so reassuring," Dave groans. "And is it even possible to die when you're already dead? Where will I go, a dream bubble within another dream bubble?" Aradia shrugs.

"Just in case, we should face our possible demise after having done everything we wanted to do in our last moments. I regretted not having done a lot of things, the first time I died."

"Alright." Dave thinks for a moment, then clears his throat. "I admit that I completely, unironically listened to a Britney Spears album once, and I enjoyed it. With you as my witness, I swear on Lil Cal's gold tooth that I wish I was lying." He bows his head for dramatic effect, then turns to his companion. "Your turn."

He expects Aradia to announce her own confession, or share some secret or juicy piece of gossip he can tease her about in future afterlife adventures. He expects Aradia to start laughing her ass off because surely there is a Troll Britney Spears and he has just given her license to mock him for the rest of his afterlife. He does not expect Aradia to seize him by the elbows and plant her lips on his mouth.

But that's the course of action she takes, and after the shock wears off he figures he might as well attempt to contribute instead of just standing there marinating in uncoolness like a total asshole. They're both sweaty from the fake South American heat and the kiss tastes mostly of swamp water and cave dust. When Aradia pulls away the mud in his hair has transferred to her forehead, a charcoal-brown smudge just under the brim of her hat.

"Okay, I'm good," she chirps in a cheery tone that most definitely shouldn't belong to a fairy-alien-archeologist anticipating her own demise at the hands of imaginary ancient tomb traps. "You may proceed, Indiana Dave."

"Uh," Indiana Dave says. "Oh. Right." It's dark in the caverns and even darker with the addition of his shades, but he swears her cheeks are tinted brick-red. The golden idol glistens under his palm, and he hopes that the cave-in kills him quickly, before his own embarrassment does.


End file.
